Coming Out of The Closet

No, not that closet.  These thoughts are very rambly.  Read it anyway. 

I am a feminist.  I'm not a new one; I think I have always noticed women's issues, but I have not really gotten into studying and learning about feminism and women's issues until recently.  So my being conscious of it is new. 

First, let me reassure you that I don't hate men.  I don't believe that men are the epitome of evil.  I do not wish to be a man.  If I were a man, I would not have been able to experience the power of pregnancy and birth, the power I share with God in creating life. 

But my beliefs in the roles women have to play in this world have changed dramatically.  I no longer believe that a man, any man, is capable of deciding what I need to hear, feel, do, or be as a woman. 

I no longer believe that Heavenly Mother is a silent figure, nor do I believe that Heavenly Father wants Her to be.  I believe that the reason we know nothing about Her is solely because our society is a male-centric society and men do not, and can not, understand the importance for women to know about Her.  As such, they don't ask the questions necessary to learn about Her.  I no longer believe that God is Heavenly Father alone.  I believe that God is the Godhead.  And I believe Heavenly Mother to be a part of that Godhead.  The scriptures state that a man and a woman must become one flesh (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5, Mark 10:7-8, Ephesians 5:31).  I now believe that Heavenly Father and Heavenly Mother are more literally one flesh than we (or at least me) can possibly understand, which to me means She is a part of the Godhead.  I am certain that She has a voice in how God helps us in our lives, how we are to be blessed, what we need to be taught and how we are taught these lessons.  And I believe that someday, we are going to know more about Her in this life. 

I believe that just by being female, I have an inherent power over our world.  And that power extends far beyond my family and home.  I am seeing more and more around me sexist attitudes about women, especially in the media.  And sadly, I am seeing so many people either not notice it (probably because it is so prevalent), laugh it off as silly and inconsequential, or just quietly sit by, believing that they can do nothing to stop it.  A great example:  The Man got a gaming magazine in the mail yesterday.  The front cover was for Halo 4.  On the back (the front and back covers were one big picture), it showed Cortana (the computer generated helper who is also a female); she's naked. The only way you can tell that she is supposed to be computer generated is that her body looks like it is made of circuit boards.  But is is most certainly naked.  There is even a hint of nipple.  When The Man saw it, he was rightly disgusted.  In the first game, she was glitchy and see through.  There was no hint that she might also be naked.  But he said that with every game she has gotten more solid, and more sexy.  Because apparently the only way you can get a man to buy a game is to put a naked woman in it.  I'm sorry, but I personally believe that my husband thinks about more things that sex and naked women  (he will probably still play the game though, because he loves the series).

I do believe that men and women are different enough that they have different spheres of power (think of the yin-yang symbol), different roles to play in how the world is shaped.  I do NOT believe, however, that that means women's roles are only dealing with the home and children.  Our society would never imagine telling a man that the only job he would truly be happy in is as a banker, and that all men must be bankers, must stay in their banks taking care of the bank and the money in it, and making sure that they are a place of rest for their hard-working wives when they come to the bank.  No, men are told that they can be anything they want, and that there are many different jobs that they can be happy in as a man.  Women are told that they are called by God to have one job: Wife-mother-homemaker.  I say bull.  If a man is not expected to be happy in one job, than we should not expect all women to be happy being mothers and homemakers.  I, personally, am very happy staying at home.  But I know many women who are not/would not be.  I believe it is important that a parent be home when the kids are, but I no longer believe that it has to be the mother.  I know that Jesse would be much happier if he could be the stay-at-home parent (probably better at it, too); if I were career-driven, I would be all over that.  And I will no longer place myself as the superior parent just because I am the mother.  Many times the fathers are just better at it.

Our world is so incredibly out of balance right now.  Women are not respected as they should be, and neither are men, or children.  I see our world as in a very defensive stance, and it saddens me.  We all believe that someone is out to get us, someone is trying tear us down.  So we must tear down everyone else first, hurt someone else before they hurt us.  We are understanding less and less it seems, how God works, how they want us to be.  The first and second great commandments are being thrown away in favor of judgement and condemnation of those who do not believe as we do.  We need to love our Creator, whether you believe that to be God, Mother Earth, the primordial soup and some lightening, or all of that.  And we need to love EVERYONE the way WE want to be loved ourselves.  If we want respect, we must respect others first. We can not force others to respect us through scare-tactics or threats or by virtue of our place in society.  That is not true respect. 

I know that someday that balance will come.  I just hope that I will be around to see it.