I hate this time of year. Hate it, hate it, hate it. Despise it. Loathe it. Abhor it. Detest it. Did I mention that I hate it? Yeah, I think I did. Yes, hate is a very strong word, but trust me, it fits my feelings for fall and winter.
And yes, I am defensive about it if you ask me what my problem is. I don't get people who like the clouds, or rain, or snow. I'm fine with both rain and snow, after they have stopped falling. Well, actually, I generally don't like snow either, unless it's a) sunny and b) completely undisturbed. Then it's pretty.
And I'm sure that the people who revel in cloudy days don't get why I don't. At least, most who have expressed to me their joy in the clouds and rain are aghast (I do love that word) when I tell them that I feel otherwise. I would really love to move somewhere where it never snows, or rains, or if it did, the cloud cover was blessedly short, and the sun could come out again. But since I can't, I just try to remind myself that at least I'm not in The Home State, where apparently it has already started snowing. Blech.
And don't ever, ever tell me that I'm the one who chooses whether to be happy or not every time I get up in the morning. If you believe that, then you have never dealt with depression. Count your blessings, if that's true.
And don't tell me that when it's cloudy out, or I will murder you.
I actually have dealt with depression and been medicated and given therapy for it and I do believe that you decide if you are happy or not but that if you honestly can't that medication is the way to go. If you don't want that though, it's up to you to pick it up if you wake up sad. I woke up crying today from my sleep and felt like crap, but you know I find ways to help myself lift my mood. Move your focus from negatives to positives, cause think about it: if you focus on everything you hate, how can you possibly be happy?
ReplyDeleteOh, I agree with you that you have to do what you can to change your mood. You do have to decide that you're going to at least keep going, if not fight. I guess I should have been more clear what I meant (it was late, I was tired, and had a bad day). I mean those people who think that deciding to be happy as soon as you get out of bed is all it takes. That after that, you will be happy. That all it you have to do is to plaster a smile on, make yourself look pretty, and bingo, you feel better. I decide every damn day of winter that I won't let it get me down, but for me, more often than not, I only do a mediocre job of it. Some days, all I can do is just distract myself with an easy read, or snuggle with The Man. I actually should be going tanning on a regular basis in the winter to get the right kind of vitamin D, but I'd rather not get skin cancer, thank you. So, I soak up what I can, and cry and vent and fume, and hide when I need to. I also know that you know how amazingly hard it can be to lift your mood when depressed, no matter how hard you try. I do try, I promise. I just really really really hate winter.
ReplyDeleteBut then, you ARE one of THOSE people, that like rain and clouds and such. Strange. :P
And I hope you don't feel like I was attacking you, because I wasn't. I know you understand what it's like.
Oh, and remember, you can call me, and we can always commiserate together. You're great that way, you know. Lovens!
Holy Happy Hell, don't you realize Halloween is almost here?!? How can anyone be sad before Halloween?
ReplyDeleteI will agree with you that the "Holidays" suck something powerful and I will be joining the bear's for a few months' hibernation until March... but, come on man!!! Hall-o-frickin'-ween!!!!
Oh, by the way, I have a simple solution to your S.A.D., move to San Jorge. It's always sunny and never snows. If the occasional rain storm does show up it passes quickly usually with just enough wind and spritzing to get the cars dirty and leave everything else a barren desolate desert of happy sunshine.
I know, I know... "I can't move, I can't afford it. Where will I work? Where will I live? Where will I go to school? The dogs will look funny all shaven. Blah, blah, blah..." Well, if you lived here, the sun and it's warmth would make you so happy as to lull you into a Vitamin D induced euphoria where you wouldn't care about all the measly little details and, therefore, they would just take care of themselves.
P.S. Halloween is only 25 days away. Hooray, the one day I seem "normal" :)
Sorry San Whore Hey friend, I'm not a big fan of Halloween either. I don't hate it, just don't get all excited about it. That's when you and The Man get to play without me interfering. Let you get all dressed up. And I would move to San Whore Hey, except that you're there, and that would mean that I would never see my husband. I would actually like to move to Arizona someday, though I have no idea why. They idea just appeals to me. Maybe it's the no-daylight-savings thing.
ReplyDeleteBut I will dream about the barren desolate desert of happiness. A lot.
Then we feel the same way again... All the time that happens where we realize we feel the same about something after talking about it a long time... I didn't feel attacked necessarily, just trying to help de poet with tough love or something.
ReplyDeleteAnd how can you not get excited for Halloween? It's the one time of year everyone has an excuse to be scary or slutty or what-have-you. You could pick a dead poet to dress up as... :D
Also, I have a friend in Arizona that we could accidentally visit if you want... >:D (I tempt thee!)
Lastly, this post is awesomely long with comments. :)
Hey beautiful, I do love clouds and rain. not so much snow -- but -- have you considered moving to Phoenix??? Arizona is an affordable place to live, and it is WARM and sunny and lovely year-round.
ReplyDeleteOh, how I would love to move to Arizona. But, that's not going to be happening soon. We are where we are supposed to be, for now. But, maybe someday, if The Man thinks he can handle the heat.
ReplyDelete